Sunday, December 28, 2014

Winter Solstice 00:03 22 December 2014 : Ceremony Zero

Morning Fire ©2014 Turtle Heart





A ceremony we called Zero.

Up in the little Alps, in the Piemonte Region, a group of us, we people of Italy, started a 3 days ceremonial cycle with the little Morning Tobacco Fire. This simple ceremony is very ancient. It was almost certainly among the very first ways in which human beings used tobacco. Long before it was smoked, , tobacco was offered to the smoke of small fires, made in ceremony, and the mysts of the lakes and rivers when trying to find home. Tobacco started its life as food for god. Something of a mirror image to a ceremony like “communion”.

The old Indians believe each one of these  little fires has the same status as a temple in Japan, a Church in Texas, or a Pope in Rome. They are legally defined, protected, accepted and long established as one step in the order and method of tribal ceremony in North America. We start our ceremonies with this morning tobacco fire: we end the ceremony when the last person puts tobacco in that fire before going home, and the ceremony is finished. First and Last. A measure of the start, a mark of the finish.In this matter, the “we” I refer to is a reference to my own person and those teachers who have guided me to this point. We have all experienced, constructed, and studied the mystery life through these fires.

In my own thinking, I visualize a solstice as a specific moment in time, a quantifiable moment. A door that opens and can be passed through…so I have always worked as best I can to brin these ceremonies at the real time moment of a solstice or equinox. This year the winter  solstice as just after midnight. Some minutes before that we were as a group inside one sweat lodge, (25 people, more or less with several outside). We rode that sweat lodge right on through the solstice and came out the other side.

I brought forward my arguments for the value of these ceremonies; I call them as a matter of formality “correction ceremonies”. To a rather formidable wall of Intellectual Milanese, with, thank you so much, a few old friends buffered around this circle of masters of the wind. 

Dear Masters of the wind that brought you
Songs made with smoke may have carried you home
Standing Still, you are carried by a Great Wind ………lifted forward perhaps
… never motionless

questions were answered with smoke
a little talking fire offered
an opportunity with the silent mystery of 
receiving Medicine straight up from the earth
right in front of you
and all your relations
right where you were standing

a chance to step up in a visible manner
a single heartbeat of clarity
so maybe you passed on through
or maybe you missed it
you were, they would say, one of those 
who was right there
at that time
if that was really you…

The goal of the ceremony, in any event, was not to present an argument to convince anyone of anything. In the eyes of the old Indians it was behavior, not ideas, that was up for consideration.

We had good food from a fine kitchen, great beds, the great forest and mountains of that region and all the exceptional ambient of this region of Italy. It is easy to see and feel why so many fine wines come from this great ecological system. Our host, Adolfo, has established a very fine infrastructure and ambient of beauty for working in groups. Being close to a population center like Milan, with so many well-made facilities, it was really a perfect place to make this group ceremony. The land we used has been in the family of our host for 900 years. Like the old Indians, his land has deep and solid roots in his heart. 


If you want to see more about this year’s Winter Solstice, please reference this link.

Monday, December 01, 2014

Murder of Mike-Mike : No Charges



My heart, a regular human heart, is telling me that the words I am hearing, the video I am watching, that the defective police officer, white man Darren Wilson, will not be charged in the rage murder of Mike Brown in Ferguson Missouri…my heart tells me it is not right; the fix was in. It is not a bad feeling. Grief and a sadness, a pressure that really has no words to explain it, except to say that it is painful and profound. It has stopped me in my tracks. I have had to sit down and take this development into my spirit and assimilate it. Contain and move forward the outrage in the silent root of my spirit.

It is important to understand how carefully the system was manipulated to produce this result. It was a constructed result. It was not and was never intended to be a search for the truth of what happened. To the carefuk observer it is in fact entirely transparent. To those less willing to study the reason, the form, the method and the details, the outrage of this picture of the white, male, GOP political machine almost demands spontaneous combustion. The forces that have justified the murder of Mike Brown do not describe an alliance  of people who search for a form of sacred truth. It describes an alliance of control, privelage, domination and self interest. A circle of shallow, lazy, indolent social vampires bleeding our resources and principles of government of their core verification of justice. No justice at all.

What and when will the final catalyst arrive to correct and rebuild this corrupt police culture? Will it be the murder of Mike Brown by Darren Wilson? Certainly right after the carefully calculated late night announcement of the no bill of prosecution, people all over the world, in fact, started moving, started calling it out, started feeling in some form the feeling I have right now as I write this. We are seeing reactions come in from around the world. Major American bridges in the big cities have been shut down. Bridges? Is there some art of irony or a spontaneous message from the void in that information?

Every time, we start feeling that “enough is enough”, sensation. Reason tries to works its way through our minds…. yet the bodies keep falling. We all need to get somewhere further down the road than “enough is enough”. This has gone well beyond those sensations. It is hard to describe, but the point of irresistible force against immovable object has only one well-known result.

What about your life? What is hurting you right now? Society cannot really change. It can only reflect the growth and or the weakness of the individuals within it. If you could make progress in your life; progress against your own anger, your own mistakes, your own rage, or your own lies then perhaps the whole world could be set right. Perhaps. There are good and honorable people who tell us that it could happen just this way. That you could change your life and change the history of seven generations. Yet, my heart has this sinking feeling. As I write I expect a sign of relief, that my reason and description I can build up the power of hope. Again. It has not arrived.

24 Hours Later. A pause to work on assimilation.

Transcripts reveal there is NO cross examination of any witness supporting Wilson’s view of the situation. None. No pointing out prior inconsidstencies. None. The record reveals witness that support Wilson being allowed to say what they wanted to say and prosecutors ask them  nothing. Wilson himself testified. He made many questionable statements but was never cross-examined. Not one damn word of cross examination. The GJ did not hear a lot of facts about contradictory statements, not one word.

Examining the transcripts of this “investigation” is maddening. Attornies across the nation ridicule it for its clear posture as basically a defense investigation designed to exonerate Wilson…and a determined refusal to ask a single question that would show another narrative. I am not sure how such an investigation can even be called a legal investigation. It is shameful, a disgrace of reason and an absolute indifference to what most people would consider “search for truth”. It is beyond frustrating. It was a stacked deck from the first opening statement to the GJ.

Why? Why would the DA office want a violently uncontrolled officer like this one the police force? Why does the state feel it would be a disaster to indicte this police officer? What is the hidden agenda here? The facts of this case fly in the face of the orchestrated and clealy biased presentation to this GJ.

It is one thing to want to stand behind your police officers.  It is something else entirely to manipulate the legal system so obviously.

Discrepancies by the dozen are all over these statements made to the GJ and not a single question to push back at these statements. Such as Wilson said at first that he was hit 10 times by Nike Brown. He told the GJ he was hit two times. No one asked him about the differences. This theme was repeated throughout the friendly testimony of Wilson. There are hundreds, perhaps thousand by now, of blogs and information sites that poke 100 holes in this so-called investigation.

There are inconsistencies in Wilson's story. He estimates that Brown ran 20-30 feet away from the car and then charged another 10 feet back towards Wilson. But we know Brown died 150 feet away from the car.” This is a question from the clear-eyed logic of Ezra Klein.(http://www.vox.com/2014/11/25/7281165/darren-wilsons-story-side/in/7041840). He, like so many other reasonable people, does not believe Wilson. Everyone asks why there was no questioning, no attempt to explain prior inconsistent statements?

Stress. The analysis of my stress makes me very suspicious of the focused, methodic burning of the Ferguson business district. It was impossible that it was random. You jst have to pay attention. Very a-typically, there was no police present in that area. None. So it burned and that is all the MSM is talking about today and it also justifies the deployment of even more police-military control…and it changed the subject. Quickly. Fire that could have been started by one person or even better, a few people working together who had planned ahead. Not protestors. Insurgents were they? For whose side were these fires started? Who would benefit most from these fires? These very determined, focused fires of 15 business’? There is a long history of official fires being started. And it seems, so far, that the business’ that burned wre owned by local black small business owners. Just them. If true why would that be? The information on the ground right now is very troubling. Follow the questions. Just the reasonable ones.

Stress. The behavior of really stupid people can look like a conspiracy when it is not. Sometimes it is really is. The fires, 15 of them, none with video of “protestors” standing around cheering themselves. From the US President down to the street cops, the subject was changed away from Darren Wilson, the Curious Grand Jury…perhaps even the truth.

I don’t want to rant. I can’t even bring myself to pound on the table. The feeling is one of great sadness. From over here in Italy, it looks like America is in serious trouble. This entry here is just about Mike Brown. He is just one of ten thousand sorrows. From here it does not look good.

All spiritual persons care about their homeland, about their fellow citizens. We care about the children and we care about our soldiers and police. We care about the sacred nature of each precious life. As an American Indian man, I know so many stories of sorrow, of murder, of humiliation and disrespect that all American Indians carry in their memories. Most American Indians and their victimization by the police, by the government, and by the courts is invisible. We have never had a case of police murdering an American Indian to make the national news. Ever. But I find myself caring about Mike Brown, about Alisha McBride, about Travon Martin. About poor old Eleanor Bumpers way back in the 1980s.

Prosecutor Robert McCullough has lead us all down a dark path. With studied indifference and childish calculation. Without honor. And then we all went back to sleep. I sometimes think if Sandy Hook Elementary School in Connecticut did not change anything, what hope does the future really have? The record of these so-called “proceedings” is disturbing: it does not seem to have followed the actual law.

…As I get ready to post this blog we hear about a 12 year old black child being shot to death by Ohio Police….

Police: Culture of Shame. Yes. A broad brush. I point out that the numbers of  police officers who have come out in passionate, zealous support of Wilson, from day one, are legion…all across the country. And NOW they all believe Wilson has in fact been vindicated when in fact he has not.


Friday, November 14, 2014

GOP Steals the Golden Pot : Leprechauns Leap Into the Sea



© 2014 Turtle Heart at Chaco Canyon


Political Commentary from Sacred Pipe
Warning: contents contains fuck, aggravation and angst.
©2014 Turtle Heart

The Democratic Leadership failed the Democratic Voters in this cycle. Failed us bad.

....and Voters Just sat on their Ass and Did Nothing

While the GOP national policy debacle was refined and focused, it was also mirrored by all levels of the leadership…and followed down to the game on the street with voters. The democratic leadership had almost nothing to say. I saw no inspiring speeches by DW Schultz, Harry Reid, really nobody. The Clintons dissed all sitting democrats and pushed their own agenda.

Why was not every dollar and every voice united behind Lundergren-Grimes? Why? If the generals in the field and the money in the pockets of the money people, if all the democratic soldiers had lined up, McConnell would have been defeated, and this would have been a singular, significant and attainable possibility. Just think of it. The GOP sweeps to victory by McConnell is thrown out. How sweet would that have been? Those who really believe, or say they believe, in the Democratic Party have failed we the voters.

The Honorable Harry Reid must be replaced. Washerman-Schultz must be replaced. Whoever our leadership is around us needs to be confronted with the obvious failures of leadership. Very very few of the established Democratic base put their time, money and effort into this election.

The obstructionist, extremist, bat shit crazy policies of the GOP are despised by all reasonable people…and they continue to win victory after victory. And not surprising victories. Predictable victories. And our leadership remains powerless. Where are the real fighters, the bare-knuckle politicians who know how to bring it on?

The Great Big Fucking Lie

“The American People elected Repoublicans to run the country and stop the illegal behavior of Obama”…said in various ways, this posturing lie. The truth reveals that the actual American People do not support the GOP. They do not. The Republicans “won” by the money dumped into the laps of their suspiciously entrenched, manufactured base…they won because the lazy, frustrated and indifferent voters in the United States did not vote. They stayed home. The republicans, the old white ones in particular (pay attention) gave the GOP this situation. Minorities, women, young people all stayed away. From disgust. The dems were unable, in most cases, to inspire their base at all. This is Primal Political Sin in my view.

This is not “approval”…this is not “permission”…it is not a mandate about anything at all. It was a track that cost billions of dollars and a portfolio of lies unequaled in modern times.  It is Political Flim Flam. Drivel being posed as Revelation.

They are crowing, preening and perhaps some of them even believe this giant fucking lie. Almost certainly the MSM will tell us this lie hourly. Pardon “my French”, but Fucking Lie is the clearest way to express this fact. Republicans wil turn this lie into Gold, a new Mythology to be written on future statues of Alzheimer’s patient Ronald Reagan. This is real evidence of cultural dementia, this new force animating the Republicans.

These facts put the democrats to sleep. No one has come up with a catchy comeback to this fiction. None of the democrats seemed able to understand the opportunity they had.

I wonder if odds makers are calculating bets on how many times Boehner and O’Connell will repeat this lie to explain their contempt, obstruction, cowardice and elite classism to those same “American people”?

It literally brought tears to my eyes to see Alison Lundergren-Grimes fail to unseat the disgusting white male known as Mitch McConnell. If the democratic leadership and their money were even paying attention at all, had helped her, she would have won. There is no question about this. Her defeat rests squarely on the shoulders of democratic leadership.

The democrats re-elected their senate and house leadership. Fail. They should all be replaced. Voter turn out was the lowest in over 70 years.

So shame on you if you did not vote. You gave even more power to this fucking lie. Congratulations.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgh !










Saturday, September 20, 2014

Professional Sports : Disposable Women : Contempt For Women Part Two

©2014 Turtle Heart : Waiting With the Wind. 1998

I do not for a minute understand why people watch professional sports. What are you actually watching? You are not watching athletes. You are watching professionals and their corporations. A business. That is only connected with winning and to making money. No other issues are on the table and no other issues are desired. Where is the sport?

If you are a woman who is a wife or companion to a so-called professional athlete, your job is emphatically to shut up, don’t make waves, don’t complain, don’t embarrass “your millionaire man”. Be quiet.

Even women who are in millionaire sports families have about the same moral and legal rights as poor American Indian women. American Indian women are the highest at risk group for domestic violence, rape, being sold into sexual slavery, and murder by a family member…by a factor of 3 to 1. There may in fact not exist an indigenous tribal woman who has not been abused in some way. No we understand that even the privileged small percentage of women who marry and date professional sports corporate employees have the same rights in cases of violence…which is to say, almost none.

I have never watched any pro sports event.Ever. I am not interested in the entertainments brought forward by multi-billion dollar corporations. Ever. I see nothing interesting in it at all. The large crowds that are fascinated by this situation are incomprehensible to me.

As an operative in American Indian spiritual and ceremonial issues, I spend a lot of my time with women who have been victims of the men in their lives. The damaged men. The lost men. The tough guys. I have seen with my own experience how almost every tribal community of American Indians are held together by the women and the elders. Not the men. Rarely. I have observed with my own experience the courage and integrity of so many fine women. I could count on my fingers the number of men I have ever worked with about whom I could say the same. Ever. All of the liars, cowards, fools, thieves and monsters I have met in my life have been men.

From the CDC: 24 people per minute are victims of rape, violence or stalking : A rape happens every 6 minutes in the USA : the national average is 1 in 5 women : among American Indian women it is 7 out of 10….over 1 billion women each year treated like this around the word….at some point, in an honest society, these facts must penetrate. Yet, in a tightly-controlled corporation, if such an item existed with honor, could in fact have a zero tolerance policy and change those statistics to zero. Ina single day.Right now. They never have.

And if a rich man beats, murders or abandons his “woman”, such as the rich so-called athletes in the NFL, that woman has less chance of justice than a penniless American Indian woman on a remote reservation…that is to say nearly Zero. The paymaster will sweep it under the rug. The high-priced attorneys will make everything the woman’s fault. In some places, the complaining woman, the victim can be killed for “allowing” herself to be a victim. Yes, this is the circumstance of corporation sports. Of billionaire sports. Of the NFL.

Anyone who “blames the victim” is a coward, an empty bag of mostly water. They should always be shouted down. It is a world wide problem about which not enough is being done.

Even by people, we can see now, by example, who could in fact use its power, its wealth, its influence with young people, to help society, to protect women, to increase our respect and tolerance for each other. Even if it is not their job, it is in fact something they could do, and do easily…all the pro sports corporations could do more to protect women, to increase the peace, to encourage us to be tolerant and to tell the truth. It is something they can do. The old American Indians used to sing me an old song, the words to the song are along these lines: “there is always something you can do”…so why not go ahead. This is true for the NBA, FIFA, GM, IBM, NBA and YOU and ME.

What the hell is all this covering up, denying, sweeping under the carpet, passing the buck….what the hell is that all about really? How do we get corporate citizens to actually be good citizens? The US Supreme Court agreed with Mr Romney, “corporations are people my friend”…how do we get their hands out of our pockets and actually onto the streets of our community doing the work of a good citizen, a responsible citizen. They seem to want it both ways, a sure sign of a liar and a thief…..they want corporate deniability but they want personhood rights, which means being accountable. To be a human being means being accountable. 

Where is that accountability to basic human rights and respect for women in any corporation, anywhere?

It is painful to see, to know, to understand that Sacred Women, those fine mothers, sisters, wives and companions would ever suffer the vulgar, pitiful cruelty of the fist of a man, the force of a man. Heartbreaking. It enrages my very soul, inflames my heart, and bends the light around inside my mind. What is lost if we respect women, exclude them from male violence? What kind of man would allow the men around him to abuse women? What supervisor or CEO would want men working under them who abuse women? The CEO of the NFL is one of those men. CEO of a corporation. How many of them are just like this? GM ring a bell? Or “Binders Full of Women” recall a CEO who not only has no interest in respecting women, he has a woman in his life he says it’s OK with her. Yes, some women also believe it is OK. And many of the other voices that could do something: do nothing. When this behaviour is OK with women, as it clearly was with a surprising number of women in the Ray Rice NFL Ravens situation, this is the perfect expression of submission, oppression and subjugation that emphasises and confirms the destructive, insidious power of rage and violence.

Right Now, there is enough money, space, resources for every person on this mother earth to have what they need. Yet corporations and their paymasters have more than they can count, and those who work and say yes to ordinary jobs never have enough. And people are hungry. Homeless. Without work or food. And women are sold as sex slaves. Women are punched unconscious in elevators in Las Vegas and dragged across the carpet like a sack of trash. And that guy kept his job, was protected by the paymaster and had his wife, whom he had knocked unconscious, come on national tv and actually apologise. Instead of supporting this woman, a victim of a severe assault, they chose to place the the weight of all that money, all that bad publicity, all that indifference on her shoulders alone. No a single word of support for her from anyone in the NFL to this day. And the game played on. NFL. America’s most popular entertainment.

Not going to watch. Not going to buy products of their sponsors.

Man Named Stone of Winter

Taos New Mexico

Monday, September 08, 2014

Contempt For Women : Part One : The Islamic State


: The Gray World Part 4



©2014. Turtle Heart

Please stop using the term “Isis” to refer to the failed human beings, the so-called soldiers of the "Islamic State".

Isis refers to a sacred woman. A historical deity who was one of the first cultural symbols of the sacred power of women in human history. It is so embarrassing how poorly informed about language our national media and leadership really is.

The islamic state chose this name after careful calculation. It is not an accident. It is perfectly representative of their contempt, their determined oppression of Muslim Women. And western talking heads in the media babble it back to us. Clueless.

Pay attention. Do not use “Isis”. Stop. Call them islamic state.

My biggest problem with Islam, at every level, is the absolute absence of respect for Women, the relentless oppression of Women, the dominance of a fetish male culture lead by homophobic radicals who apparently had no mothers; are not loved by anyone and whose only authority is argument by murder. The radical Muslims have, in my view, completely hijacked the religion of Islam. The so-called moderate voices of Islam are in fact the people running away, hiding, fleeing by the millions, and they have no voice at all. I know it is more complicated, but this is a perception…that there are really no significant voices of moderation in Islam. In particular at the religious side. The only well known so-called Islamic clerics are hardly moderate, and not at all like clerics.

I do not want to be confused with radicals. I am a religious cleric in my own way, from the American Indian side. I would like to see compassion, peace, respect for human rights and negotiation over murder any day. American Indians have their own problems with American Indian women. They are much more likely to be raped, beaten, murdered or sold into slavery than any other group of women in the United States.  At the same moment, in the same places, American Indian women are the ones most likely to have a job, raise the children or live a life of sobriety (than the American Indian men).

So the problem is hardly unique to the Islamic State and their fellow Muslims. Worldwide, over a billion women are abused in some disgraceful manner every year. One Billion.

What does all of this tell us about the leadership of men? I dare not state the obvious. I might be accused of taking sides.

The failed human beings of the islamic state who have crawled out from under the broken stones of the Arabic desert are lost inside an empty male culture, guided by the wisdom of dirty old men.

The people who are there, in that desert, they are the ones who need to stand up and claim themselves. The fat old king of Saudi Arabia could pay everyone to stop being radicals. From his pocket change. Like the invisible moderates, the Arabic Royalty has nothing to say in the light of day. They talk only in shadows and back rooms; they never use their own mouths to speak. This is the emptiness of only having money and nothing else. Money all by itself can buy a lot of things, a lot of people. It cannot lift a dead religion from the sewers its radical clerics have carried it. It cannot lift a single veil from a single woman. Money cannot put down the gun. These things can only be set free by human beings whose hearts are open, whose hands are empty, and whose women are free. There is no one like that in the population of the failed human beings of the islamic state. I wonder if it is, in fact, infectious. The Zombie Apocalypse is not going to arise from Zombies, it is going to arise from Islam. From men.





Sunday, August 24, 2014

Mike Mike : Murder By Police, Part 3


Mike-Mike

In the previous blog I tried to point out the strange relationship between the popular fictions being presented these days with the less than celebrated reality down on the streets and in the halls of the golden tower….so many people it would seem prefer the sweet emptiness of not being well informed at all about what is going on. They read nothing. They watch nothing. They see what is behind them more often than what is in front of them…..people turn off their senses. Poor people do it from the stress and longing for a better future. The rich do it so they will not hear the voice of the poor or the envy of their neighbors. Because they are afraid.

©2014. Turtle Heart Chaco Canyon
At any given moment in time, only a few percentage of the people is paying attention.

Honestly. As an American, I am ashamed. When I travel I tell people, “No. I am not an American. I am an American Indian”. I am ashamed of my country, deeply and without a shred of satisfaction. The political right has become so inhuman, it has become almost impossible to stay calm when American GOP voices speak. And it seems for every vile act of obstruction or hateful comment made by the GOP, there are a dozen silent voices on the other side. Sometimes I feel like my head is going to explode when I even see John McCain or Mitch McConnell, or see the droopy-eyed dog’s as face of Paul Ryan.

The howling dogs at FOX news, truly some of the dullest, most insipid human beings ever to appear in public service in history, define the information agenda every day. Every day the FOX spewing heads talk and all the other media outlets tell us in painful detail what they said, instead of telling their own stories. The outrage, so they say in their headlines, of the progressive media to what FOX has said today fuels them to amplify and repeat over and over the very arguments that outrage them. You never have to watch FOX news yourself, just listen to what all the other media outlets do to spread their words under the guise of “outrage”. It is a very strange problem.

Yet, in studying the faces and expressions of people in the news all around the world, it is surprising how few people know who their political leaders are, what their police are doing, or what is happening in the world. It is not just Americans who refuse to know their world. Why is it so hard?

On Al Jazeera English, just now when I was writing this, a news segment came on showing how the middle class white people were reacting to the murder of Mike-Mike by a white police officer. To those white people it was a big yawn. Most of the anglos the reporter talked to showed only the most basic, and generally incorrect, awareness of what was happening just a few miles away. They looked like nice people. People completely unaware of what is going on around them. Life in a Bubble. This is the new reality. Yes, I watch Al Jazeera English a little every week in my time I spend watching the news of the world. It can be very interesting to see your country’s actions being described by an unsympathetic foreign country. Having watched in detail the events of the aftermath of the murder of Mike-Mike, which was heart-breaking and wrenching, and then see the camera shift over to the white indifference just a few neighborhoods away created a deeply unsettling sensation in my spirit. Unsettling and shame.

And now we know officer “wilson”, a suspected murderer, who gunned down Mike-Mike, has “supporters” who have donated nearly $300,000 to help him out. A dollar number that is growing every day. To be sure, people who want to help the family of Mike-Mike are donating money as well, but not nearly so much (so far). And this fact brings up a new contest between which camp will raise the most money I guess.

Murdered American Indians

There are hundreds of murdered American Indians. Tens of thousands of raped American Indian women. The criminals who killed, abused, raped and robbed are rarely found, rarely brought into the courts. The police rarely investigate the killing of an American Indian. There are over 600 unsolved murders in South Dakota alone. The Indians are invisible.

There are a large number of American Indians in the Ferguson area. Invisible people. Ten times more likely to be killed. 100 times more likely to be abused. 1000 times more likely to be arrested. 10,000 times more likely to get long sentences. 100,000 times more likely to be forgotten and ignored. By the justice system. By the government. By the police. By their own leadership. By you.

Yet I feel really affected by the murder of Mike-Mike. Even though I am an American Indian. Even though I live on a little island in the Mediterranean. I am a human being who cares about his country. A human being who wants to be proud of his country. A human being who can see the rage and inhumanity of a stupid, poorly trained, uneducated white police officer murdering a young black child, from a troubled and oppressed neighborhood and the protection of that corrupt police officer by a clueless, detached, inept local government. A babbling, timid, spineless and bubblehead governor. A democrat of all things. Missouri. North America. 

Heart of Shame.

Pantelleria Island

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Game Of Thrones : Coming Down ( With a little help from Homicide By Police )



Coming down from game of thrones. Yes. I watched all four seasons, I just finished and then read all five books, when I came back the news was police murdering men of color just randomly....

.....At the beginning of the summer I watched all four seasons of game of thrones, 40 videos more or less back to back. I then read all five of the books published so far. Searched for information on book 6. And concluded that Martin is a devious and merciless bastard who has somehow, almost without anyone noticing, changed books, films and, as well insured the highest levels of pirate video sharing so everyone on earth will eventually have seen this series…..and that last bit is inevitable and unstoppable. The Imp, however, that Lannister bastard can perhaps be stopped. Unless. Danaryes is the key to unless. The immortal imp, Peter Dinklage aka RR Martin, is now immortal as well, having mastered and gone beyond. He deserves it well. So, I finished watching and readings (and dreaming about sometimes) and soon realized I was swept up and going back to regular business was an effort. An experience. Perhaps a surprise.

During all this epic binge there were homicides of honest people by the police, indifferent desecration and looting of dead passengers on a commercial flight home, missiles, blood and yet more new houses in the Jewish/Palestinian questions, declarations of a just self defense by a Hammas leadership composed of mad dog fanatics whose only agenda is hatred and death (and they are masters at pushing that button)…somehow in this world we tolerate for reasons that escape me, Hammass either as people or an idea…we hear about these things through the empty chambers of American leadership, where the distinguished leaders from the other side have left their bodies, sold their souls and votes, whose minds have been destroyed at the election to such high office a person of color (I’m talking to you Senator Mitch McConnell of Kentucky)…yet everyone says these people will win new powers in November….and I was thinking Game of Thrones World was where the unreality lay hidden as entertainment and literary musing only to find it was not there at all but everywhere around me, here in Berlusconi Land….(otherwise it is such a charming place: ie., no guns for one thing).

Where are we all going in our shiny cars in the night, to paraphrase an infamous bard from a generation ago?

By the way, I am not really so much taking the side of Israel with the Hammass comment. Everyone should watch “Five Broken Cameras” to see what arrogant and hateful official policies and behavior by the Jews towards palestinian people. There is a cultural hatred each sides has for each other that is nearly DNA in nature…but Hammass is a different story. They are gangsters who want to punish everybody for everything. They are black holes with teeth and state of the art weapons.They are the shadow of the rage of so much oppression by the ancient and not so ancient european masters of the past..or is that just an excuse. Their memory of peace and mathematics has been forgotten, but their memory of rage lives on. Hammass is a sad and sorry lot. Bringing out the worst in all of us, even me. You to…probably.

On the other hand the news today confirms that it is not right, what happened to Mr Eric Garner. Murdered by the police in NYC for no good reason at all. Today we hear that the NYPD is retaliating, harassing and now has arrested the young man who made the video of the murder of Eric Gardner, whose death has been officially ruled a homicide.

We need to watch the cops. They all carry this shame today, every one of them. What will NY do? They need to arrest and bring to trial the man who killed him. An American Police. Watch them the way The Imp might watch the Gold Cloaks….seriously

As I was getting ready to post this, two more Homicides By Police: Michael Brown, murdered; John Crawford III, murdered in a walmart. How many more before the week is finished? Brown was accosted and murdered in less than 6o seconds, unarmed. Jaywalking along an empty neighborhood side street. Crawford had picked up a toy gun in the walmart.

Homicide by Police? It is OK or what? Who are you people?

Monday, July 28, 2014

The Fatherless Child : Homicide By Police

Copyright 2014 Turtle Heart


So many police departments have militarized. It seems nearly epidemic. And each time we hear about another incident, we see clear evidence of what can only be described as murder by police. California, New Mexico, most recently in New York city. For decades I have been haunted by Eleanor Bumpers. An agitated, 90 year old lady, murdered by New York city police officers. Nothing happened to those cowards. Nothing ever happens to police who murder citizens.

Why is that? Why the fuck is that?

The national media is serving us a narrative implying that the problem here is related to fatherless children, specifically fatherless black children. American Indian communities have a rate of fatherless families. (Conversations about people of color usually implies blacks, occasionally hispanic….American Indians are rarely included in MSM rhetoric, but face all, and more of the racially motivated problems of blacks).

On the other hand, so many millions of children were beaten, abused, denied and oppressed by worthless fathers, the fatherless families seem much more fortunate than one might expect. Women are sacred; women have raised more of the world’s finest citizens than any father.

My father was an ice man, a violent, rage-fueled old soldier that was impossible to have a conversation with. My childhood experience, at home, was of a hostile and dangerous silence, until the day came I could hit the door and move out. Getting away from my father was one of the most important moments in my life and probably saved it as well.

In the old tribal communities, everyone raised the children. Even when I was a boy, visiting my mother’s huge family in the south, everybody took responsibility for the children My mother’s brothers told me stories, bought me gifts, taught me how to drive, take a drink of beer and talk to girls. I never had any conversations in this area with my father; he never told his two sons anything about life, anything about himself, anything about the world.

I find, 66 years later, that my father damaged me, deeply. I made a good life for myself, on my own terms. Yet, in the silence of my old man memories his words, used like bullets, and his silences used like a wall, his continuous ridicule and contempt for the subjects I was interested in…..it was hard to take, hard to carry. Even now there are moments when my experience with my father brings big tears and waves of sorrow. When I meet good children who had great parents, you can usually tell right away. There is a balance about them missing from the millions of us hated and beaten and abused by our fathers.

Yes. Overcome. We can overcome the limitations, terrors of our childhood. So many of us do. But we are all the walking wounded.

Perhaps the police stalking black fathers had fathers like mine. I might have grown up as a killer, as an outraged police or a jealous and greedy politician. I once seriously considered becoming a mercenary and trained very well in many violent arts. America will never fully understand how close they came to experiencing an armed revolution overthrowing their government. There were some very determined and powerful men, well known men, who were doing this planning in the shadows. I was part of it for a short time. The old American Indians rescued me. They snatched me out of being fascinated and charmed by rage, seduced into striking back. They carried me into the sweat lodge, covered my bleeding spirit in sacred smoke, carried me with old old songs to a different world. It is a world as ugly and dangerous as this world, with the same broken fathers. But it is a different place. It is a place that set me before a great table of knowledge about peace, about personal responsibility, about how one person can make a difference, about healing, about helping other people. And that is where I have been ever since. Sacred Pipe saved me from the world of my father.

Seeing video of the murder by police of Eric Garner in New York City…..I lived in NYC. Eleanor Bumpers lived in NYC..those cops were determined to fall down on this big black man, this father, you could see it in their body language. Their license was the cigarettes he was selling one by one, for fifty cents. “Losies”. Murder by police. Live. Again. Murder by Police.

I struggle with coherence in my efforts to understand, to express my understanding as if I were actually able to make sense of the death of this man. Just as getting far away from my father saved me a young man, moving away from AmeriKa ten years ago has saved my life as an old man. I moved to Italy. To a little island. Filled with peace. Without guns. The police are polite. A few years ago some police beat a citizen. After a long hearing they were fired and one of them sent to prison. There is no tolerance for overtly violent behavior by the police here. No citizens with arsenals of military weapons. A free and gracious and reasonable healthcare for every citizen. Italy’s corruptions and sins lay elsewhere, in its bureaucracy, in its mafia culture entrenched in business, and food distribution and construction projects. Our criminals are shadows without guns. I like it much better. It is not perfect, but I feel more freedom of actual safety and life here than I ever felt in the USA.

America has a black father. All the white people hate him. He is intelligent, articulate, capable and compassionate even in the midst of several shortcomings as a US President, he is a sterling adult human male father. And those sterling Anglo enablers and protectors of police exoneration for every bullet and legislators of law obstruct and denounce every word that comes from his mouth. And nothing changes.

The yellow police who choke-holed and murdered Eric Garner should be arrested and charged with murder one, in an honest court, but murder two at the least, “reckless abandon of the value of human life”……..until armed police accept responsibility and represent the humanity of our democracy every police officer in the United States is marked by this shame, every day.

Death By Police For selling a cigarette. 

And now more fatherless children, who will be made to carry the guilt of the yellow police rather than the dignity of their father, who was present in their lives  until the police murdered him.


It is not right, what happened to Mr Eric Garner.

Turtle Heart
Pantelleria Island

Friday, July 04, 2014

Men With Guns : Don't Ever Trust Georgia



©2014 Turtle Heart Old WW2 Bullets, Pantelleria
One need only watch any random video of Middle eastern fighters, on all sides, firing automatic weapons into the air, to understand the vile ignorance and nearly pathological absurdity of such behavior. I am talking to you NRA.

The Georgia that gave us Newt Gingrich. And the Georgia that has yet to take him back. The Georgia that gave us Martin Luther King. The Georgia that has now given us "guns everywhere, every day".

A lot of my childhood was spent in Georgia. Near Augusta Georgia. I still have people from my mother's family living in Georgia. I went to my first whole roasted pig BBQ in Georgia. I stayed up all night with a charming black man, whose name I never knew. Together we made BBQ of a 200 pound pig. And sipped whiskey. Everything that man said to me is still in my brain, 50 years later. i was just a kid. he wasn't invited to the BBQ. My friends, that was a really incredible teaching, and a great feast that took place the next day with my nine uncles and 2 aunties.

I know Georgia pretty well. If you look at the photographs of young and middle-aged white men moving around with their rifles and pistols.....are these the faces of people you would trust with your children, your money, or your safety? If you are even a beginner at body language, what we have seen so far is a parade of near losers glowing under all the attention a gun has given them. Excuse me, if I must be excused...just look at them yourselves. they are on google, facebook, the international MSM. In lockets around the neck of Wayne LaPierre.

10 years ago I moved to a country where it is nearly impossible for an average citizen to have any sort of fire arm beyond a simple hunting rifle. They take knives just about as seriously. That country is Italy, and I am in the south of Italy. It is a place associated with the Mafia. And yes, the Mafia in its various flavors is quite well established. But there are not any guns really. Determined professional criminals and hard core survival-vet types can get weapons in any country in the world. Can't be stopped that situation. Ever. But aside from that, this is a truly non-violent, generally murder free culture. I like it. I have finally calmed down after 55 years of American Stress.

Can gun carrying citizens of Georgia be trusted? No way. Almost certainly this little NRA experiment is going to bite everyone in the ass.

Some part of me thinks it is a good idea to have a military grade rifle and a stash of ammunition. Just in case the apocalypse decides to arrive in my lifetime. Another part of me imagines the melting down of all of these guns wherever they may be...into almost anything else. In the Middle East there are so many guns, there must be many families hoarding massive firepower. They will never willingly give them up. Ever. Americans probably won't give theirs up either, at least not willingly. Brings us back to that apocalypse...

American Guns Everywhere People have not yet become as depraved as the men with guns in Africa and South America...there still seems to be actual laws that make it illegal to randomly fire the AK-47 you took to the shopping center to shop for groceries and beer. Is that the next step for the NRA...the right to discharge your military assault rifle into the air? If you can carry it, why can't you fire off a few rounds?

I don't miss the stress that comes from the continuously violent pressures of American Life. Not one bit. You all look quite crazy from over here.


Saturday, June 21, 2014

Solstice of Summer 11:51 CET Pantelleria

©2014 Turtle Heart










copyright 2014 Turtle Heart
Near the Edge of the Grey World

Sometimes the answer is no
sometimes the answer is hell no
where should you stand when thunder falls?
how far away must you run
before you understand your shadow cannot be overtaken
disguised or ever closed, or ever empty----?








When I was awakened 
beneath the summer sun
I was all alone
All alone perhaps I wept
All alone I put my foot forward
I started moving
Following the track of the sun
around the earth
resting only with the moon
singing only with the birds
dancing only with the wind

unarmed but not surrendered
free and wild, yet imprisoned by the indifference
of sleeping ghosts and wailing victims
feasting at the long table of their suffering…..
where they count the bullets and list
the insults and name the monsters
who told them hell no

I will sit not so in silence
afraid of my own skin and bones
and dreams
to see the light in the storm
the peace in the thunder
the safety of the truth
noisy and painful and confusing as it all is
my heart, a regular human heart
is on fire with the sorrows and the outrage
of all my relations, all my ghosts
all my monsters have torn that heart
ripped it into four parts
it was taken by the wind
it was burned in the fire
it was thrown into an ancient river
there my bones were sailing
my shadow actually pointed the way
I sailed north
I looked down
tobacco falling from my fingers
I put everything together again

me and my shadow in the long river

Turtle Heart
World Journey of the Four Directions Unity Bundle

Tuesday, June 03, 2014

A Soldier In the Field: Support Bowe Bergdahl

Update : 13 June 2014 12 noon CET : 
Welcome To Texas Sgt Bergdahl...Welcome Home

Yes. he is now back in the USA, in Texas, good old Fort Sam Houston, if my spelling is correct. I took part of my medical truing there in 1968.

I feel our young people are paying an unacceptably high price for their military service. For all the public "support the troops" that drips like acid rain over the national leadership, something is not right. We are not supporting our soldiers. We are abandoning them. In spite of all the money, organisations and so-called public support for our soldiers, we are failing them. The case of Bowe Bergdahl is the flaming tip, the flawed crown jewel of GOP outrage. The GOP is the beating heart of the disgrace to our soldiers.

John McCain is their point man. Mr Outrage. Mr Bomb Iran. Mr Bring Back The Bush Military Team. McCain stood on the floor of the US Senate yesterday and blamed Mr Obama for the new insurgency in Iraq, being fuelled by insurgents streaming in, armed and battle-hardened from Syria. If his solution involved putting the pilot McCain in an old war jet and giving him a map to Iraq, I say let him go. As a soldier myself, I have come to loathe the plastic warrior and his unrelenting outrage. A wounded and broken warrior, McCain is to big to stop, to big to send to therapy, to big to vote out, to big to ever consider silence. He might also be the only important voice right now who could, who should, welcome Bergdahl to Texas, embrace him, thank him. No one does the right thing anymore, not at the national level, not just straight up. We loose learning and growing opportunities, we lose them everyday.

America could embrace, welcome and forgive Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl and great things would happen from that wave of compassion and great common sense. As individuals, we can free ourselves of the poison of outrage manipulated onto us by the GOP and Fox news one by one. Writing this blog right now, I welcome him to Texas. Welcome home Sgt Bergdahl. A grateful nation may yet kill you.

Update: 11 June 3 PM CET : Immediate Intensity Field (IIF)

As to Bergdahl’s platoon? I would like to know more about what kind of platoon was this? The picture so far is not very encouraging. A reasonable person would argue that the context of Bergdahl’s departure must include the nature of his unit. What kind of platoon was this? These other guys were all saints and Bergdahl alone was “different”? Really?

The Chain of Command is required from top to bottom to bring soldiers home. All other due process follows in order.

It is appalling, frankly being exposed to the widely telegraphed  dirtball, provocative, fact-free rants of people like Morning Joe, Hannity and the other bottom feeders in suits who seem to thrive and cherish the lavish and pitiful and hysterical manipulation they provide for suckers like us to consume. Media statistics tell us the ranting invective of the right gets a lot of attention. Time magazine ran a cover this week “Was He Worth It”…referring to Sgt Bergdahl. Time magazine has shown the journalistic integrity of a fish wrapper in this cover. I am done with Time magazine.

The Bergdahl Family Tragedy is about to double down. This over-hyped vitriol is dangerous to him and his family, possibly his entire community. He is from a small town that has all been very active and attentive to the hope to have their local son come home. Now what can happen? The consequences of international media attention has destroyed lives in the past. Though that part of the story does not get covered in such detail. 


The Immediate Intensity Field. A new mortal weapon, disguised as "breaking news". And since those guys are covering it we have to cover it, and in just a few “breaking” moments a digital information tsunami eclipses everything, reason in particular…while what really happened will trickle out somewhere farther down the road. IIF. A new weapons technology brought to you by GOP. 
(Except for Eric Cantor).

Original Post: 

To Ted Cruz, who has had to face nothing more dangerous than looking at his sap face in the mirror, he should shut up and say nothing about soldiers. Ever. Like most of the whining GOP clowns posturing over the returned soldier, they never served in any army. They know nothing. They are not entitled to an opinion.

To the crazy old man, Senator McCain, he is just crazy. A looney old man whose answer to everything is to bomb Iran. No one pays much attention to him anymore. Before he became a fool he was a soldier. But he left that behind. He has disgraced, at last, his own service, his own uniform in my view. No one cares anymore John.

To the bitched out comrades he served with: where were you with your loud and wise-guy observations when the soldier walked out the door? What sort of comrades did he have that saw nothing, knew nothing, did nothing? Your outrage is made of plastic and a desperation for attention. To little to late.

Why was the release of  this soldier not a moment of national unity? Was it the legion of Chicken Hawks in the United States Congress, partisan lap dogs of the GOP who never served in the military.

His father is a sterling, beautiful man. Millions of boys would like to have a father like his. My father was a career soldier. He was also a heartless bastard. Had the same thing happened to me, he would have believed I deserved it, getting captured and held prisoner. He grew a beard to show solidarity with his son. He learned Pushtun culture and language so he could communicate with the Taliban assholes who were holding his son. He learned their history; their hopes and aspirations. He was able to ask them in their own language and by their own customs not to hurt his son.

I am so sick and tired of the reflexive outrage of the GOP to virtually every word and action by this US President. In my long life I have never seen anything so disgusting, so yellow, so hateful. And somehow these empty men get votes, get reelected, raise money and stand before the American People with straight faces.

Cheney, an un-charged war criminal, barks and squeaks like a rat being held by his tail. Interestingly, GW Bush has kept his silence. Cheney is perhaps the most vile and reprehensible white man to ever hold national office, in my view. He tells us the United States President is weak. Why can’t anyone in the GOP speak words of some dignity and support? It is perverse and beyond reason, this reality we have before us…of those men, of that political party, of these values.

Bowe Bergdahl. When he was 22 years old. Walked into the arms of his Taliban captors. 22. Five years later he is coming home. He is just 27 years old. A young man who has been dragged against his will through the looking glass. Emerging at last into the loving arms of his family, he faces the dark hearts of a new lunatic fringe. It may in fact be the case that his long nightmare has just started. Now the American People will replace his Islamic tormenters with American Patriot Tormenters. Well-funded they are. Well organized they are. The have Fox news. They have famous and influential faces in the United States government. They even have their traveling clown show headlined by donald trump.

It all seems so familiar. Benghazi. White Water. Oliver North. Aluminum Tubes. Bowe Bergdahl. Mitch McConnell. Waterboarding. And don’t forget Jesus and Hitler. And the political party throwing around the trash: the Republican Party.

I was a combat soldier in Vietnam. 1969. I am grateful, as a soldier, that America has brought Bowe Bergdahl home. Thank you Mr. Obama. We soldiers serve a political machine dominated by cowards, liars and fools. How rewarding it has been.

I support the “deal” that brought him home. I support the Quatar billionaire diplomats that brokered the deal. I support his family and his little Idaho hometown. I hope they let nothing throw a shadow over the pending homecoming of their native son.


I support the bullet (or Drone) that waits for these five “terrorists” ….. a little farther down the road....if and/or once these men, imprisoned for a dozen years, decide to return to battle...by which time the US will be out of that country. On the other hand, the US will be required by international law to free all imprisoned persons taken in the war. Taliban soldiers are not classified as and are not considered "terrorists". they are legitimate soldiers fighting, in their view, an army of occupation.

Did Bowe give "intelligence" to the Taliban? Almost certainly. Every study of soldiers captured in war reveal that every soldier in captivity gives up information. No one is going to be tormented and tortured and not give up information. A more important point is to wait for a fuller story to be revealed. All this phony outrage by the political right is just disgusting and vile posturing for political effect. In the end all this toxic noise will make it much more difficult to know exactly what happened in the case of this young man.

The only soldiers to publicly trash and accuse Bowe of wrong doing were sought out, prepared by and presented by Republican GOP Big Money. Any soldier who would allow himself to be used like a whore by a partisan political machine must be viewed with suspicion...extreme suspicion. Good soldiers do not trash each other at the request of GOP Pay Masters.

Sgt. Bowe Bergdahl's father has been attacked by the millionaire, over-stuffed paid political operatives of the FOX division of the radical right. For the beard. For learning and speaking Pashta and saying "Allah" while standing beside the United States President and Commander In Chief of the United States Military. I would have paid any price to see that kind of support and love from my father. Attacking the father reveals clearly the low character, the final collapse of honor, of the so-called Fox "news" agency.

No matter the final story. No matter what. The United States was obligated to bring this soldier home. The Chicken Hawks are so despondent to see the end of the war. That's the kind of people they are. No matter what I will not change my support for Bowe Bangdahl. The truth will not hurt us. But all these lies and all this manufactured outrage is hear breaking. I moved away from the USA after 9-11. I live in Italy now. From over here, America looks like it is loosing its mind, its soul. And not because of a US President, but at the hands, the choking, enraged hands of the political right. Outrage without reason. Accusations without facts.

That's it.

Update: 5 June 01 am :


The media is really digging in. This may be one of the lowest shames in recent memory. The media is doubling down on the hysterical and rage-fueled non-facts being peddled by the professional right. Even while decrying the lack of actual facts, the media almost universally gives a new attention to every outrageous claim made to date....just to state what is painfully obvious.

I am sorry to hear that the little town where his family lives is canceling its homecoming celebration. Their official position is that they are in no position to deal with the incoming swarm of outraged patriots, and they are probably right. The town has probably already filled up with devil hunters and truth seekers. many with paid contracts.

Hilary Clinton is reported to be visibly attempting to distance herself from any show of support. I am not yet sure it is absolutely true. If it is true that she has done this, she has lost my vote, a vote I have held onto for decades.

This is the new low, and its only been a few days. From here it looks like America has lost its mind....I remain myself in full support of the deal, the soldier, and the President. Full stop.

Blog Archive